NASA to Choose Mars Candidate From St. Kitts & Nevis

NASA has turned its sights outward towards The Caribbean, specifically St. Kitts & Nevis. James “Rocketman” Jones, Mars Mars Agency Recruitment Specialist (MARS) said, “We want a more diverse crew to go to Mars, not just a bunch of white men and as part of this diversity we want to include the Caribbean.”

“We chose St. Kitts & Nevis because of the amazing resilience of its people and their ingenuity as well as environmental training. Because of the crumbling and poor infrastructure, Kittitians and Nevisians are used to living without running water, electric, electronic communications and other modern necessities for days, weeks and even months at a time. Despite this, they often rig up elaborate workarounds with random equipment.”

“This has trained and conditioned them for similar conditions that would be encountered during the long trip to and from Mars.”

“We have begun to interview candidates. We have already interviewed a man by the name of Ras ‘Herbalicious’ Tafari. He claimed to have already been higher than any other candidate. He also says he orbits the moon on a daily basis.”