Government Announces Electric Hybrid Car Program

SKELEC and the Government of St. Kitts and Nevis have partnered with world renowned Teesla Motors of Shenzen and Dubai based firm Eel and Mosque to make St. Kitts and Nevis a leader in green technology.

John “Sparky” Brodshaw, Supervisor of High Information Technology (SHIT) for SKELEC said, “We are unique in that we are such a small island in size. We can much more easily move to green solutions than bigger countries can. We are announcing our initiation on of our electric hybrid car infrastructure program and import program.”

“We also realize that hybrid cars are very expensive and that our economy would not support a model like the Tesla Roadster, so as a more affordable alternative we are introducing the Teesla Classic.”

“This is not the first time The Federation has been a pioneer in vehicle technology. Everyone probably remembers the cutting edge ambulances of a few years ago.”

“Unlike other hybrids, our Teesla Classic offers several distinct features built in at our request to meet our local needs. As Harris recently said, what is suitable for other cultures does not always fit our unique needs, and SKELEC has heeded that advice in customizing the Tesla Classic specifically for The Federation.”

Unique features that have been included are:

  • A unique sportster open top design allowing continued views of The Federation’s beautiful nature.
  • Comes in Labour Red
  • Floats on a cushion of air to avoid the potholes

“Unlike most electric cars which require long charge times and special charging stations, the Teesla Classic needs none of that. Instead like the days of electric trolleys, the Teesla Classic obtains its power from overhead electric cables so there is never a need to find or wait on a charging station, and there is no need for expensive batteries. This brings the cost of the Teesla Classic well within range of our drivers.”

“As many of our customers know, many of our utility poles are directly to the side of the road, or in many cases even in the middle of the road. Despite chiding about driver safety, this has been intentional and allows us to deploy the necessary overhead wires very quickly.”

It’s a Hybrid!

“SKELEC will not be able to provide overhead wires up all the way into some of the far reaches of the villages. And despite SKELEC’s reputation of legendary reliability, we realize outages will occur from time to time. Because of this the Teesla Classic not a pure electric car but is also a hybrid.”

“When electric current is unavailable the hybrid mode is activated by voice command. Simply say Teesla, Yabbadabbadoo! The Teesla Classic will then engage in alternative motor mode by opening a small panel in the floor of the vehicle.”

“While this mode is not as convenient, it is very green too and emits less CO2 into the atmosphere than a traditional petrol vehicle.”

Drivers Education Center

“We realize that learning drivers driving on the road before they are ready is also a vexing problem in The Federation. As part of our program we have also constructed a learning driver training center.”

“When not in use for driver education, the cars can be rented out and used by children. Given how little care is given to driver education in The Federation, its never too early to start.”

“We also realized given how drivers drive in The Federation, that it was a good idea to leave the training bumpers on the cars which are deployed to the roads. Since the police won’t ever stop someone for reckless driving and let the busses drive like homicidal maniacs, we decided a Nerf approach might not be a bad idea.”

Image result for bumper car

 

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